Compassionate Candor for Difficult Conversations
Conversations relaying 'bad news' happen in our professional and personal lives everyday. Bad news can be defined as any information that might be perceived as a loss, a threat, unexpected in a negative way, disappointing or life changing by the recipient.
Frequently, those leading critical conversations are so distracted by trying to manage their own discomfort they approach these engagements as ‘get in-get out’ missions that quickly evolve into train wrecks with unintended results.
FBI Statistics report that a significant number of active shooters had been let go from their job shortly before the event and 17% on the day of termination. A sobering statistic for any company preparing for layoffs or a termination for cause.
‘Compassionate Candor’ is a communication process that is an effective tool for both messaging and situational management when a difficult conversation becomes necessary. Used in tandem with strategic seating arrangements, Compassionate Candor can be a game changer for achieving intended results for sensitive conversations, in and out of the workplace.
Employed with skill, Compassionate Candor can help repair unintended outcomes from previous convos that went off the rails and facilitate progress with people that have a history of being passive-aggressive or obstructive.
The following are examples of 'difficult conversations’ that Business Leaders, Physicians, Attorneys, Law Enforcement, Estate Planners, Social Service Providers, Call Centers and more commonly engage in, with plenty of war stories about outcomes that fell short of intentions. Any of these examples sound familiar..or still give you nightmares?
Employee termination, performance counseling, missed promotion
Lay-offs; Company Mergers
Client termination; unintended outcomes with clients
Apologies
Grim diagnosis/prognosis, metastasis; no treatment options
Death notifications
Losing an impactful legal case
Being cut from a will; upsetting information for a deceased client’s family; DNR’s & advanced directive convos
Cancellation of needed services; lost customer property; working with clients experiencing a significant loss
The beauty of Compassionate Candor is its ability to communicate information that may be difficult to hear and absorb whilst getting to a place of consensus or understanding. The goal is to effectively address the issue without sacrificing the relationship. This is a much needed skill sorely missing amongst the ranks of management at all levels, resulting in workplace ‘scratchiness’ and an escalation of disruptive behavioral issues.
It doesn’t have to be this way!
Like going into an important presentation assuming that ‘winging it and hoping for the best’ will be sufficient, going into impactful conversations unprepared, without solid skills for creating positive results, is the quickest route to unwanted outcomes. It increases the risk of unintentional harm to others and possibly your career.
Why take the risk with critical conversations when tools are available for better outcomes?